nHibernate Emergency

I've spent the last two days trying to get my first bit of nHibernate 
to work. I am in "No Persister" hell. I have done everything and can't make it work.

Please, for the love of all that is holy, help me!! 

If you know anything about nHibernate, please visit this page at google groups, where I detail my pain and save my bacon.